Choosing Myself
A Memoir & Practical Guide
Breaking the Cycle of Childhood Trauma and Self-Betrayal
Are you that person who has fought for everyone — except yourself? This is the story of recognizing the patterns, counting the cost, and doing the most important thing — choosing yourself, finally and completely.
Sometimes the most expensive decisions aren't made in moments of crisis, but in moments when you ignore what you know because you want something else to be true.
— From Choosing MyselfThe Story You Recognized Before You Read It
Some patterns begin before we have words for them. Choosing Myself is the unflinching account of learning — through childhood, through relationships, through cycles of self-betrayal — that the most dangerous thing you can do is silence the part of you that knows the truth.
This memoir does not offer easy answers. It offers something more challenging and more valuable: the honest account of what it cost to keep choosing everyone else, and what it took to finally stop.
Structured in three parts — The Story, The Reckoning, and The Return — this book is for anyone who is realizing they have been disappearing, slowly and willingly, for years.
Three Parts. One Truth.
The memoir and workbook follow the same three-part arc — the story, the reckoning, and the return to yourself.
Recognizing the Pattern
The childhood environment that taught you to shrink. The relationships that confirmed what you'd been told. The patterns you couldn't name but always felt.
- The earliest lessons about love and worth
- How conditioning becomes identity
- The pull of the familiar over the healthy
- What you knew and what you told yourself instead
Counting the Cost
The reckoning. What staying actually cost — across health, identity, time, and self-respect. The most difficult chapter to write but the most necessary one to read.
- Honest accounting of what the pattern took
- What you were protecting — and why
- The role self-betrayal played in your own story
- The moment clarity arrives and what follows it
The Return — Building the New
Where the memoir becomes a practice. The 30-Day Deep Question Isolation™ Practice, daily discernment tools, the magnetism vs. connection framework, and the protection practices that make choosing yourself sustainable — not just a decision but a daily discipline.
- The 30-Day Deep Question Isolation Practice with daily log pages
- Magnetism vs. Connection checklist
- Daily discernment journal template
- Energy audit and limits without over-explaining
- Morning stillness practice
- Personal mantra and commitment letter
- Nine daily affirmations — tear-out reference page
- The choosing yourself framework built to last
Choose Your Journey
The memoir. The workbook. Or both together at a discount — the complete Choosing Myself experience.
The complete memoir — 21 chapters across three parts. The story, the reckoning, and the return.
- Available in print and ebook
- 21 chapters, three-part structure
- Includes Part Three practices
- Available on Amazon and Digital Download
The full Choosing Myself experience. The memoir tells the why. The workbook gives you the how. Together they are the complete practice.
- Both books included
- Save 25% vs. buying separately
- Fillable/Printable PDF workbook + digital & PDF memoir
- Everything you need to begin
Ten sections of guided journaling, the 30-Day Deep Question Isolation practice, daily affirmations, and the magnetism vs. connection framework.
- 10 sections, 30+ guided prompts
- 30-Day Deep Question Isolation practice with log pages
- Stands alone or pairs with the memoir
- Interactive edition: best completed in a web browser on a computer, with answers that save automatically
What Readers Are Saying
"I kept stopping to write in the margins because I kept seeing myself. This is the book I needed ten years ago and the one I needed right now."
"The 30-day practice alone is worth the price of the workbook. I have never been asked to sit with myself this honestly. It was uncomfortable in the best way."
"She doesn't give you a checklist. She gives you a mirror. And then she stays with you while you look into it. I felt less alone reading this than I have in years."
New Vision Meditations: meditations in your own voice
Answer five tap-only reflection questions, record the script in your own voice, and let it play over a frequency-based sound layer matched to your focus. A meditation that sounds like you, built around what you are working through.
- Five focus areas to choose from
- Record, preview, and re-record in your own voice
- Plays with the screen locked
- Every meditation saved to your personal library
- 1
Choose a focus
Pick the area you want to work on today.
- 2
Answer five questions
Quick taps, no typing. Your answers shape the script.
- 3
Record your customized script
Read your customized meditation script in your own voice.
- 4
Relax and meditate
Play your recorded meditation over a sound frequency layer matched to your focus.
Read the Free Breaking the Loop Guide
Enter your email and receive this Free Guide — the same tools that helped me break the cycle of self-betrayal — delivered directly to your inbox.
No spam. Just the freebie. Unsubscribe anytime.
Frequently Asked Questions
The memoir is available in paperback and Kindle through Amazon. E-book versions are available on Apple Books, Google Play and as a digital download by clicking the designated links in this site. Click the “Get The Book” or "Shop" buttons for current links.
It is the companion to the memoir. It has 10 sections of guided reflection, and it includes the 30-Day Deep Question Isolation™ practice. It is available in print through Amazon and as a fillable, printable PDF. An interactive edition is also available. For the best user experience, complete the workbook in a web browser on a computer. Your answers save automatically in the browser and on the device you use, so please continue on the same browser and device each time because your answers don’t carry over to other devices or browsers. Do not use private or incognito browsing, because your answers will not save. After purchase, you will receive a private link to access it.
It is a reflection practice from New Vision Mindset that uses a series of “why” questions to move past surface-level answers toward what is hiding deeper underneath the patterns. The workbook guides you through this process over 30 days, with daily log pages.
Yes. The memoir and workbook are offered together as a digital bundle at a savings. See the shop section for current pricing.
Enter your email in the “Get the Free Guide” section and it will be sent to you.
It is a mobile app where you create meditations and hear them in your own voice, played over a sound frequency layer matched to your focus.
Yes. You read your meditation aloud, and the app plays back your own voice. We recommend you do a 10 second test recording to gauge the right volume of your voice. The app does not use AI voice cloning.
Yes. Your meditation recordings are stored only on your device. This is explained in the app and in our Privacy Policy.
It is available now for iPhone, on iOS 18 or later. It has not yet been fully rolled out for iPad yet but is iPad compatible. The mobile app is in the process of being released on the Google Play Store so stay tuned for future updates.
The Pattern Awareness Quiz is a ten question quiz that takes about two minutes. It points you to the focus area that may be asking for your attention right now, and based on your answers, the quiz provides you with the best focus area to continue in the app.
It is free to download. Meditation features require a subscription (monthly or annual) or one-time lifetime access. The monthly plan includes a 7-day free trial when eligible. Current plans and pricing are shown in the App Store.
Yes, your meditation keeps playing when the screen locks.
Subscriptions are managed through Apple. On your iPhone, open Settings, tap your name, then Subscriptions. Billing questions and refund requests go through Apple.
No. The book, workbook, and app are tools for self-reflection and personal growth. They are not therapy, medical advice, or a replacement for professional care. If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, call or text 988 (the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline in the U.S.) or contact your local emergency services right away. If you are outside the U.S., please contact your local crisis hotline or emergency services.
If you have any questions or concerns about your purchase, you can contact us by email at truth@newvisionmindset.com, by phone at 800-717-1573, or by using the Contact form on this website.
Which behavior is asking for your attention right now?
Ten quick questions to help you see what's really going on beneath the surface. No wrong answers, just the ones that are already true for you.
- Answer with your first instinct, not your best-sounding answer.
- Takes about 2 minutes, one question at a time.
- You'll get a focus area, and a next step made for exactly that.
Freedom begins when limited beliefs end.
Freedom begins when limited beliefs end.